Thursday, July 26, 2012
There it was . A blood stain - on the bed . It continuously got bigger . That was it. That - was done for. She should have felt shame, all she felt however was pain. Some from the obvious 'injury', the rest from the dulling headache which was making it easier for her to think of sleep. Pain preceeds shame. Any one could have told her that. Shit . The urge to shit - and wash off the mess. Pain , the urge to sleep on the floor to avoid the blood , her own blood. Tomorrow , she would think what she should feel. There would be devastation , tears , loss of appetite , some more tears , anger , shock and despair . It all must come in stages. Today - there was that need to sleep. The need to just move on. It was not allright. Ofcourse. Blood inducing injuries never are - they leave stains , must be cleaned and hence thought of. And they involve people when they leave scars. She slept. Not worried , not hasseled , not as violated as she should have felt. Sleep and Exhaustion preceed social responses to rape as well.